Thursday, June 18, 2009

Health Scare!!!!!

A new addition to the Hotmen Colony, Mr Hayden Christiansen, has been willfully ignoring all health and safety protocol in the colony and has been seen on numerous occasions taking his pet pig out and about in town. Despite numerous requests Mr Christiensen refuses to make his pet pig wear a mask for the safety of many in these harsh times, what with the spread of Swine Flu reaching Pandemic proportions and all. When we confronted him while he was out shopping for food at the exclusive Good Looking Farmers Market with his current squeeze and star of P. Diddy's music videos, Little M. Sunshine and his pet pig, who's name we have withheld for privacy purposes, he simply shrugged and shouted "DIPLOMATIC IMMUNITY BITCHES" and threw dirty Leeks at us. As if that wasn't bad enough L.M. Sunshine waved a baguette and screamed "would you let YOUR babies wear MASKS???" and proceeded to burst in to tears.
Luckily for Mr Christiensen, he has boyish good looks and sparkling blue eyes and when he speaks sweet music plays in our ears. Otherwise we would have had him flogged for sure. Beware Mr Christiensen, we all grow old and although chances of you looking distiguished in old age are high, there still is a small chance you might end up looking like Mickey Rourke in spandex (shudder) and THEN we'll see who'll throw dirty Leeks in who'se face.

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